


Behind The Wall

by SonGolifreya



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Drama, Fluff, Happy Ending, Humor, Love, M/M, Pain, Philosophy, Psychology, Romance, Slow Burn, Songs, Teen Romance, rich Eliott
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:00:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28435023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SonGolifreya/pseuds/SonGolifreya
Summary: “You have to do something about it. It’s unbearable! Your girls scream like wounded animals.”“Well, I don’t feel like it.”“What?!” Lucas bugged his eyes out at his neighbor. “Why?”“If they stop screaming, a cute angry puppy won’t knock on my door again. Now go to sleep. You probably have to wake up early tomorrow,” the guy smiled, tousled his hair and closed the door.A story about a thin wall that turns out to be much thicker than it seemed at first glance...Lucas and Eliott. Universe #1190.--------------------------------------------------------------Each chapter is named after the song to which it was written.So eventually those who reach the end of the story will get a playlist of 32 songs.
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Comments: 15
Kudos: 83





	1. Bad Reputation

**Author's Note:**

> It wouldn't have been possible without incredible (hakikos), who took on such a painstaking job, and I'd like to give her credits for the translation of the original story.  
> creation by saluzorra (https://instagram.com/saluzorra?igshid=nnqghivommg9)  
> I wish you a pleasant reading!

_  
  
_

_She got a bad reputation_  
_She takes the long way home_  
_And all of my friends seen her naked_  
_Or so the story goes…_

“What the heck? Are you kidding me?”

Lallemant rolled over and covered his ears. It did not help. Neither did the pillow, nor the music from the headphones, nor pleading, nor tears. His legs started to shake frantically as in a nervous breakdown. He abruptly got up and threw off the blanket, the pillow flew to the floor. Lucas roughly pulled his headphones and began to circle the room. Luckily he lived alone and no one could see his desperate misery. A couple more weeks of such training and he could claim to be an Olympic champion. The guy stopped and looked out of the window, then glanced at the alarm clock. 3 AM. Lallemant pulled his hair and whined. He pursed his lips in anger and stared at the damn wall.

Lucas entered a prestigious university a couple of months ago and ideally could become a decent programmer afterward. His school teachers had forseen his being in demand and a good salary, if not a position in the Ministry of Defense. It encouraged him to work hard day in and day out. That was the reason he put so much effort into getting his scholarship. Without it he could only hope for a low-grade college and a lame job at some shitty place. His mom had no opportunity to support him, his father could not care less, having disappeared from his life, so Lucas could rely only on himself. And he bloody did it! Yann managed to enter the same university, albeit a different department. That was all Lucas could ever dream of. And starting from the very first day he decided to give his all to his studies. He was determined to attend all the lectures and seminars and do practical assignments with no help from anyone. He was willing to make every effort to complete all the tasks perfectly. But the universe seemed to hate him.

And Lucas hated her back. He believed in the idea of karma. He was kind and affable, with his own demons of course, but no one could ever call him a troublemaker. While his neighbor was definitely a proud holder of the title Bastard of the Year. The galaxy's biggest jerk. The king of assholes. Lallemant had moved into the dorm a month ago. It had taken him forever to be done with all the papers necessary for the move, so when he had gone through that hell and it was over, he wept for joy for two days in a row. He didn’t know it was a waste of tears. The real hell had been waiting for him in a form of a devil right behind the wall of his dorm room. Every second day, sometimes more often, his neighbor brought in a girlfriend and arranged a sex marathon. Each time a different girl. That guy had never made a sound or uttered a word, only his occasional heavy breathing gave away his presence. On the contrary, his girls screamed as in some low-quality porn movies, loudly, dirty, with uncoherent ramblings. Lucas’s torment was sponsored by the thin walls. Sometimes he wondered why they had been built at all, it was easier just to hang the curtains not to be bothered with construction, and they would serve just as good.

“Yeah! Harder!”

“Yeah man! Fuck her so fucking hard that she pass the fuck out!” Lucas shouted at the wall.

“Don’t stop! More!”

“Tape her mouth shut, please! I’m begging you!” Lucas had to be in the class at 8 am the next morning. In just five hours. A high-pitched pig squeal came out from behind the wall, and Lucas growled in utter despair. He ran up to the wall and started punching it.

“If you don’t gag her with a sock just right now I’m going to rob the gun store and give you both ‘The Shining’! It’s 3 AM, man! Let me get some sleep!”

The scream and thumping of the bed stopped, everything went silent just for a few seconds, and then he heard this evil chuckle, and his torture continued. Lucas looked out of the window. He often did so when he wanted to run away. Run away from a big mean girl when he had been a kid, or from dumb classmates when he had been at school. His room was on the second floor. If he jumped out, he wouldn’t be able to kill himself, however, becoming crippled because of a neighbor with an uncontrolled libido was not yet a part of his plan. He sat down on the bed and covered his ears again. Okay, he’d just run out of weed, his last chance to let everything go and forget about the injustice of the dorm room distribution. It finally dawned on him why this room had been free. Lucas thought that it was a blessing he deserved, a chance to escape from the further protracted paperwork, that he wouldn’t have to fight with someone for a place in the dorm. Well, he didn't have to. He’d been offered a room, he’d agreed.

“I should have tried sleeping in the street,” he turned around and glared viciously at the wall. “At least I would get to sleep!”

***

“Mr. Lallemant, are you… are you sleeping?!”

Lucas looked up just to notice a professor standing right in front of him. He could barely resist yawning. He must have been looked embarrassed and confused. Suddenly it was dead quiet in the auditorium. The lecturer kept glaring at him, and the only thing Lucas could do was to try to figure out what the hell was going on. Finally the professor ran out of patience and rolled his eyes at the insolence of the student.

“May I ask you a question Mr. Lallemant? Why are you sleeping during my lecture? Well, I’m not a fan of standing here at nine in the morning and explaining the same thing year after year either, but it’s my job. And your job is to pay attention, listen and try to understand. So let me repeat the question, why are you sleeping, Mr. Lallemant?”

“I’m not sleeping.” The professor's face contorted. It was not clear what the man really felt at that moment, anger or bewilderment. And actually Lucas could understand him. Lucas’s answer definitely needed some thorough revision. But he could not just claim that his neighbor was an asshole who attacked defenseless girls every night using his dick instead of a knife. Lucas was sure that normal human beings do not make such sounds during sex. Lallemant had heard something similar once when he'd watched a documentary on Animal Planet, the moment hyenas had torn an antelope. Of course Lucas still remained a virgin to his shame and disgrace, but he was definitely not going to scream like that during his first time. The guy sitting next to him at the next desk leaned over.

“Dude, you snored.”

“No way, I don’t snore,” in an instant Lucas’s face turned a shade of red-hot magma, another second and there would be springs of steam coming out from his ears. Lallemant felt dizzy. He was going to vomit.

“You do!” the entire audience responded in unison. Lallemant freaked out and pulled a hood on his head. He'd only been studying here for a couple of months but already completely and irrevocably screwed everything up. He managed to fall asleep during a math class. The class where the whole course of students was present. And Lucas was sitting in the front row. He got dizzier and dizzier. It was still 20 minutes to go before the lecture ended, and Lallemant just wanted to run away. However not only was he sitting in the front row, but also right in the middle of it to his bad luck. The only way out was to push the professor away and jump over the desk. His inner voice was persistent in shouting “Run!”, but his conscience spared him from further disgrace. Lucas raised his guilty eyes and looked at the man.

“I am sorry. I can leave the auditorium, if you like,” Lucas wispered.

“There’s no need for that, Mr. Lallemant. You can stay if you promise not to snore louder than my voice,” Lucas’s face was covered in red spots again. If he really snored that loud, then he got branded with this scandal for life. Though maybe it was not a bad idea to quit university right now. “Would you please take off your hood? We shall continue.”

“Thank you. I do apologize,” Lucas came out of his shell and stared at his notebook – the drool was all over it. He had been drooling. Fantastic. Now he could throw the notebook away. Lucas made an effort to make out the topic of the lecture written down in it but failed. “Well, great. Looks like I won’t pass the math exam”.

“Oh, come on. You can do it. Professor Malcolm is a good man. My brother graduated from this university a couple of years ago and told me a lot about him. He will forget it, trust me, he won't even remember your name,” a brunet next to Lallemant whispered quietly. “Sorry I haven’t introduced myself, I’m James. I’m a US exchange student. France is a nice country, and Paris is a beautiful city.”

“A beautiful city I wish I could run away from,” Lucas cringed with embarrassement. He was sure everyone was staring at him. Remembering that he never introduced himself, he turned to James and held out his hand while the professor was writing something on the blackboard. “I’m Lucas.”

“Nice to meet you, Lucas.”

Lallemant had no spare notebook to use, so the only thing he could do was sit and stare at the board. The lecture ended in 15 minutes, and there was no need to flee from shame anymore. Professor Malcolm gave him a look when Lucas was leaving. Lallemant dropped his eyes and tried to blend in with the crowd of students, but the man watched him intently. Lucas flew out of the auditorium like a popping champagne cork. He completely forgot where he was heading to. Okay, he remembered that next was the math seminar and it was conducted by one of Professor Malcolm's graduate student, Emma. Emma, who got stuck in 2001 and had side bangs like Rachel Green. James tried to follow him, but Lallemant broke into a sprint run. He desperately needed some time alone to calm down and clear his head. He took out his phone, checked the schedule and found himself to be in a wrong wing of the building. Well done. Being late was what his dying reputation lacked.

“Okay, at least during the seminar I have to be on my A-game,” Lucas sighed and quickly walked in the right direction.

The bell rang all of a sudden, and Lallemant nearly jumped out of his skin. The keyboard bounced and loudly hit the desk, and Lucas could hear distinct chuckles from behind. He tried to figure out what those chuckles were about. He recalled he had been given a task, sat down in front of the monitor to find a solution, and then he blinked, and now the class was over. Luсas stared at his blurry reflection on the computer screen. Half of his face was adorned with a keyboard imprint. He had fallen asleep again, and this time no one had woken him up. He hid his face in his hands and whined. At this rate, there was no sense thinking of quitting this uni, he would be kicked out instead. No one would take his forever sleepiness for the hard life of a freshman. Lucas growled.

“Mr. Lallemant, Professor Malcolm asked me not to disturb you while you were sleeping. However, you have to fix the keyboard or bring a new one. Would you please take care of that this week?” the girl pointed at the device and walked over to her desk.

Lucas looked at the keyboard. Excellent, this time drips were even on the floor. He disconnected the device from the system unit and wrapped the cord around it. Lallemant promised himself to bring it to his neighbor and tried typing a couple of words with his neighbor’s nose. Let him pay for it. Or even better, he could bang the keyboard againts the wall day and night and yell like crazy. He stood up abruptly. There was a break in classes and he could go to the dorm to get some sleep. The only problem was that neither his alarm clock, nor a phone ring, nor a fire siren, nor a nucler explosion would be able to wake him up. He flinched when someone patted him on the shoulder. Lallemant turned around and saw James.

“Dude, I’m sorry. She told me not to touch you.” Lucas put on a pained face. “At least you didn’t snore this time.”

“Yay!” Lallemant raised a fist and feigned joy.

“Any plans for the break?” guys left the room and stopped. “I’ve been thinking of going to the canteen. I won’t survive the day on just breakfast with two more classes to go,” Lucas’s new friend smiled. “Cool that we are in the same group, man.”

“Good idea. I couldn't even eat in the morning,” Lucas glanced at James as they headed to the canteen. “And yeah, that’s cool. My schoolmate Yann also studies here but in a different department, I rarely see him now. With all the chores and paperwork I did not have time to immerse myself in my studies, let alone socialize with other people.”

They reached the canteen in a pleasant silence. The guys might have known each other for just few hours, but Lucas felt it was going to be a good friendship. The canteen was a total mess. Compared to school, it looked like a battlefield. Everyone was shouting, taking food away from each other, throwing it at each other, and the managers did not seem to care at all. Lucas grimaced, and it was close to becoming his usual facial expression. James nodded towards the serving counter. The line was way too long and they spent way too much time waiting. Yet when they grabbed their meals, they were lucky to find a free table right near a window. They could observe the entire canteen from there.

“If I pass out, please don’t wake me for a while, okay? I need to have some sleep to stay in conscious for the rest of the day,” he mashed a potato in his plate with a fork. He was not really hungry but Lucas knew that otherwise his next classes would be accompanied by the loud sounds of his gurgling stomach. “So have you met lots of people? French can be quite stubborn.”

“Indeed. No one wants to speak English to me,” James was full of energy. Lucas would love to get some of it if only James could share. The last thing he needed was to wake up with his face down in a plate of mached potatoes. “I’ve been speaking French since I was four. It’s not a problem for me, but I still cannot get used to speaking it all day long. French pronunciation is difficult.”

“Sorry I don’t speak English. Languages are not my thing,” Lucas waved his hand listlessly. He had no idea what James was talking about, and he had no energy to focus on that. “ I can’t take it anymore. If my neighbor keeps this up, I’ll just die.”

“Keeps up what?”

“He brings in girls very often. There’s no any music faculty in the university as far as I know, but they all seem to study in the vocal department. They scream, over and over again. The last one squealed like a pig,” talking about a painful issue seemed to give Lucas some strength. He fidgeted on his seat. “I knocked on the wall, I begged, I cried bitterly – nothing helps. They keep coming and screaming.”

“Why don’t you talk to him?” Lucas did not expect such a meaningful question.

“And what should I do? Enter his room in the middle of the process, pull him off the girl and talk? I haven’t even met him in person. He must be sleeping in the morning while I have to go to my classes. He is definitely a senior. There’s no other way to explain why he has so much free time in the morning.” Lucas began to eagerly eat his mashed potatoes and peas out of anger. “What a shame, I drooled over the keyboard.”

“You still have the letter "R" imprinted on your cheek.”

“How am I supposed to survive the next four years?”

“Talk to him, man. Maybe you could agree on some sort of schedule for his glorious sex life,” James was done with his meal. “Or you can find a loud girl and give him a run for his money. You can work in a duo and keep the whole dorm up all night long. And a cherry on a pie: imagine your screaming girl wakes him up. Sweet, sweet revenge!”

“Well, I don’t think I can bring in a girl…” Lucas dropped his eyes.

“If you don't want to bring a girl to your place,” James went silent for a moment as if considering different options, “Fake it. Play some porn and jump on your bed. I bet everyone would want to jump on a bed just like kids do, it’s an opportunity you cannot miss.”

“I’m gay.”

“Oh,” James pursed his lips and looked away for a second. “Right, that’s going to be a bit more challenging. I’m straight, so I can’t say for sure, but I don’t think it would be easy to find a guy who screams out loud with pleasure. Anyway, look around, maybe you can find someone here. There are around three hundred students, about 10 percent of them belong to LGBT community. That makes 30. Half of them girls, so cross out 15 lesbians. That leaves us 15 gays. You are one of them. 14 in total. Don’t you think you can find an assistant for your revenge?”

“I don’t want it. Don’t want to be like him. Every time a new girl. Using someone to annoy your neighbor sucks,” Lucas gave him a warm smile. “I’m romantic. I want to find my only love to be together forever.”

“I’m not telling you to bring a new guy every day. You can find someone. Just as a starting point for a relationship. And it doesn’t matter for what reason,” Jason leaned back in his chair and pointed to the crowd of students. They had strategically perfect position. Technically they had to leave the canteen as they had already finished their lunch, but sitting there was comfortable. So damn comfortable. “Lucas, just turn round and have a look.”

“I’m not sure it’s a good idea,” Lallemant seemed a bit reluctant to rush for it.

And still he turned around.

His eyes slid over faces. His mom told him once that being a student is the best time of life. A time for freedom, happiness, confidence and light impunity. He counted three guys with dreadlocks, one goth, a guy with pink hair, a bald girl. Someone was wearing three sweatshirts, and someone had just a translucent T-shirt on. People were laughing and yelling, someone pretended to fight at the serving counter. Lucas was missing this energy, a feeling of being in the flow. But he could not fit into it. He could blame a sleepless night, but Lucas felt that the reason was in something else, something bigger, something different. After he had been bullied by his schoolmates, he had been afraid to open up to people. Why he had come out to James was a mystery to him. When someone is kind to you, you unconsciously reach out to that person. And James had accepted him the way he was without any further questions.

Lucas tried to get rid of unneccessary thoughts. He slowly breathed in and out. From the whole variety of odors, he distinctly smelled bitter cigarettes. The smell hit him so hard that he badly wanted to take a puff. Just one puff. He took a deep breath, unconsciously trying to catch a little more of that odor. No one had entered the canteen in the past few minutes, so the smell spreaded as if from nowhere. Lucas began to look around for its source. He closed his eyes. And opened them again. James noticed how tense Lucas was. He kept silent, letting Lallemant watch the crowd and search for something. But Lucas was no longer sure what exactly he was looking for. And yet his excellent eyesight did not let him down.

Of dozens of people around, Lucas noticed a slightly stooped figure. The guy was wearing a beige jacket with drawstrings, dark skinny jeans, and wrist bracelets, one of them with Hello Kitty. He stepped away from the service counter with an empty tray. The line was long, and the guy didn’t seem to have enough patience. The stranger turned towards the crowd looking for someone. His belt was not fully tucked into his jeans and hung down to one-third of his thigh. Lucas looked at those long, slender legs and felt envy: he could not boast of being tall. Everything about that guy expressed universal boredom. He shrugged and turned his head towards Lucas. In an instant Lallemant slid under the table, making James chuckle. But the stranger did not pay attention to him. Lucas was saved by a wide pillar. Today he found two new friends, James, and the pillar. And he saw a beautiful stranger.

Lucas shouldn't have listened to James. Now his gaze was following those blue eyes, and he just could not help it. His brain paniced and sent signals that it was a really bad idea to stare at the guy like that. But the rest of Lucas was already out of control. That face… His slightly sharp features, nose, lips, his pale skin and even dark circles under his eyes were beautiful. Even his hair that seemed to be unfamiliar with a comb looked perfect to Lucas. He just looked at the guy, but that was enough for the remnants of sleep to disappear. At some point he realized that he had been holding his breath. He’d been holding it from the very moment when he’d turned his gaze from those blue eyes to the lips. Lucas made several attempts to find a flaw in the stranger, but to no avail. The world around him turned quieter, the light turned softer. He could only hear his pounding heart. It was hard for Lucas to keep it together, emotions overwhelmed him. Would it be stupid if he rushed to ask for the guy’s name? Or not? While Lucas remained in numbness, the guy turned his head away and walked out of the canteen. It was only when the door slammed that Lucas sighed and regained consciousness. The Earth started to spin again.

“A love is born.”

“Oh, shut up,” Lucas replied with a wide smile as he continued to stare at the canteen’s doors.

***

Lucas trudged from the academic building like a wounded seal. Occasionally and unintentionally he bumped into passers-by, but the good thing was that no one really scolded him. Just one look on his tired eyes and pale skin was enough to frighten off all enemies. It took him half an hour to get to the dorm instead of ten minutes, and struggling with the stairs took all the remnants of his life. Lucas was almost over the last stair flight when he heard yelling and a door slamming loudly. A tearful girl ran around the corner he was going to turn to. She was holding a jacket and a broken heel, her mascara was smudged across her face. A familiar, nasty chuckle came from the back of the hallway, and suddenly Lucas got a second wind. The last steps did not seem like Everest anymore. Lucas ran up to his floor and looked to where the chuckles were coming from. He did not manage to see who could do this to the poor girl. The door slammed shut. In full 30 seconds, Lucas realized that he was standing in an empty hallway.

He rushed forward and froze at his neighbor’s door. He raised his hand fiercely to pound it with all his might but never did it. All his resolve was gone. What can he say to this guy? Stop having sex? Do it anywhere else? Lucas dropped his hand and just stared at the smooth surface of the door. On the other hand, if the girl had run out of the room, it would be quiet tonight. Luka looked across the hallway. There was a shower. He tousled his hair and decided that they could wait until tomorrow, then turned around and headed to his room. It was only 6 pm, but Lallemant didn't give a damn about it: he took off his shoes and the T-shirt, unbuckled the belt on his jeans, let them fall on the floor, stepped over, and collapsed onto the bed. A second later, he was snoring louder than a rocket engine. In a dream, he saw only the ocean and the beautiful stranger...

***

“Oh God! Yeah! More!”

Lucas opened his eyes. It felt as if a grenade exploded nearby. He jerked so hard that he fell out of bed, painfully hitting his tailbone. He stood up, groaned, and looked out the window. It was late at night, yet he could not see the clock from where he was standing and thus had no idea what time it was. Lallemant turned to the wall. Again. The bed creaking, moans and pleading not to stop, again and again. Lucas was ready to sell his soul to the devil to stop it. Tomorrow he would write an email to the architect who had designed this dorm asking him to try spending a week in his room. Maybe he should cover the walls with foam and cardboard. Oh, he’d got a better idea, he would wrap his neighbor in a roll of cardboard and throw this roll into a container together with his screaming girlfriends. Rising from the floor, Lucas noticed that it was only one in the morning. His neighbor started early today.

“Why so early?! Why not at 3 am?” Lucas started hitting the wall. His face flushed with anger. “Let me get used to your schedule at least!” Another nasty chuckle behind the wall. Lucas was ready to destroy this piece of paper proudly called the wall. “You think it’s funny, jerk?”

The process behind the wall didn’t stop for a minute, and Lucas heard his neighbor’s undisguised laugh. He was laughing at Lucas. Lallemant blushed and was ready to spew lava, pain, and suffering on people. He looked ridiculous though. Disheveled hair, doggy print boxers, and flowered socks. Instead of a hellish Rottweiler, an angry poodle was sitting on the bed with his legs tucked in. While Lucas was trying to figure out how to fix an unfortunate mistake in his life, this mistake started to have sex again. Lucas narrowed his eyes and decided to wait. It could last till the very morning, and yet he would catch the moment when they paused to talk to the asshole. Proved by numerous case studies, not a single girl stayed at his neighbor’s overnight. Lucas did not want to sort things out in front of a stranger girl. And there was no doubt she was a new one.

“I’m a shark on the prowl, I’m a shark lying in wait,” Lucas whispered to himself.

He was rocking from side to side and waiting. He tried his best not to move in time with the creaking behind the wall. There was some vile feeling of presence as if he was with them in the same room. Startled at this thought, Lucas continued to rock. At some point, the screen of his phone lit up, notifying him of an new facebook message. Lucas picked the phone up and saw a text from James: "Are you asleep?" They had added each other as friends in the afternoon.

“Make a guess,” Lucas pressed the ‘Send’ button. The hellish symphony behind the wall continued.

“It's 1 am, dude. Seems like your neighbor is having fun again!” Lucas managed to look through Jame’s facebook page while he'd been waiting for a reply. James was a musician, he played the guitar and had a good voice. Lucas could not understand why the hell James had chosen his uni department. He had a girlfriend, but as Lucas understood it, she remained overseas.

“I’ve got tigers tearing lambs here,” Lucas texted quickly. And in a moment he sent a question he was interested in. “Why on Earth did you end up in our department? Why not anything related to music? I watched videos on your page, man, you sound great!”

“Better than girls behind the wall?” Lucas rolled his eyes. He put his phone to the wall and recorded a voice message. The reply came immediately. “Sweet mother of Jesus, that doesn’t sound like an ordinary sex! More like ‘Hannibal’ to me, yeah, he’s definitely eating her alive! Fuck, should you maybe step in and save her?”

“What an insatiable bastard,” Lucas’s fingers quickly ran over the phone. “I decided to wait till the murder is done and go talk to him. If he is a jock, I’ll retreat, if he is frail, I’ll intimidate him.”

“Brave is your middle name,” James sent a laughing smiley. Lucas leaned against the wall but immediately pulled back not to feel the revolting shaking. “I think he really is a bit of a dick. No one in their right mind would do it all night, changing girls like underwear.”

“There’s a mistake in your sentence.”

“What mistake?”

“You said ‘a bit of a dick’ instead of ‘a total dick’. You’d better correct it. I’m sick of just looking at it.” James sent him a string of laughing smileys. “Why are you still awake? Ah, yeah, the classes start at 10 tomorrow, not bad.”

“A moment of inspiration. I’m working on a song,” Lucas opened his eyes wide in awe. Even the sounds behind the wall became quieter.

“Will you let me hear it?”

“Absolutely. I’ll play it to you when it’s done. I’m not shy about showing it to others.”

“I’ll hold you to it. What's the title?” Lucas bit his tongue. He could decently play piano and had done a bit of dancing in his life, thanks to which his body was toned and flexible.

“Are you kidding, man? The title is the hardest part for me. It seems to be simple, not a big deal, you got the music, lyrics, but the title… it should embrace it all. Can you give a name to the story of you life on a short notice? It’s hard, because everything is so changeable,” James had a point. Lucas re-read his reply in an absolute silence, but a strong slam of the door dragged him out of his thoughts. He glanced at the wall.

“Wow! Where’s my bottle of champagne? It’s over!” Lucas gazed at his desk. There was so much he wanted to tell to his neighbor that it would be better to put his thoughts in order and think the conversation through not to let it turn into an ordinary quarrel.

“Congrats!”

“Lucas, are you still here? Lucas?”

“Yeah, I’m waiting”

“What for?”

“For him to get dressed. I don’t fancy talking to a naked guy. This could be a bit distracting.”

“Why do you think he will get dressed? He is in his room, he doesn’t need to,” Lucas nodded to the message. The assumption was sound. James had some sort of reasonable thinking at 1 am.

“Okay, here I go.”

“Good luck!”

Lucas put his phone down on the bed, stood up and opened the door. He stuck his head out in the hallway to check if anyone was around. As expected, it was empty. Lallemant plucked up the courage and left his room, carefully closing the door behind him. He froze for a couple of seconds and opened the door in case he had to retreat. He liked to watch documentaries about wild animals and knew that they always secure their escape routs. He put on his most menacing face, straightened his back and made a deep inhale to seem bigger and more intimidating. Thinking of how dangerous he should look now, he banged on the neighbor’s door. Someone started to grumble inside the room.

The door opened and… the guy from the canteen appeared in front of him. He looked tired, sleepy and a little displeased. His hair seemed to be even messier than it had been in the afternoon. Lucas’s eyes caught a jacket that was hanging on a hook and clung to it as if to a lifeline. He could look at anything but the owner of the room. All his resolve was gone again. Seeing that guy here was even worse than a jock neighbor as he had to face up the object of his hatred and adoration rolled into one. How Lallemant was supposed to think of a fight with him. He just stood there, looking into his eyes and drowning in them. After a couple of seconds, the stranger came back to reality and opened his mouth to find out the purpose of the visit, but Lucas was the first to act. He leaned over closer to the guy, grabbed the handle, and closed the door. He probably should have photographed the surprise on the perfect face, but the plan did not contain any further actions but to escape.

Lucas ran into his room thanking Animal Planet and shut the door. His heart was pounding and his chest was heaving too often. He rushed to the wall and put his ear to it. Now it seemed too thick for him. Behind the wall, not-that-much-of-a-stranger sat down on the bed.

“What was that, puppy?” was all Lucas heard. He moved away from the wall, his face twisted and his body started to tremble. Lallemant still hoped that this ‘puppy’ was not meant for him. “Cat got your tongue?” Like a robot, Lucas got out of bed, put on his slippers, which looked like two toy dogs, and headed to the door. He noticed the keyboard and grabbed it without thinking. The next moment he found himself knocking on the door of his neighbor.

“Woah, you are not deaf, are you?” the guy opened the door and smiled sweetly. For a second, Lucas thought that he lost all his anger, but his neighbor quickly put everything back in its place. “Why are you so silent? Woof?”

“I’m not a puppy for fuck's sake!” Lucas could barely contain himself. “What are you doing? It’s almost 2am! I can’t fall asleep because of you and your screaming girlfriends, and the next day I can hardly stand. Will you be so kind as to shut them up?”

“You come to me at two in the morning with a keyboard, something’s dripping from it, by the way... In doggy print boxers, dog slippers, and what am I supposed to call you? You haven’t given me your name,” the guy leaned on the doorframe, stared at Lucas, and everything inside him fluttered from that look. All self-control Lucas had at the moment was aimed at keeping his gaze above the guy’s neck. Below was a territory where Lallemant was sure to lose himself forever. Though he couldn't look into those eyes either. “Gag them with a sock is a bit too much, don’t you think?”

“So you heard me?” Lucas was surprised. “I have boxers with different prints, for your information.”

“Usually I’m more interested in what’s beneath them. Though if you feel like sharing, you can tell me everything about the prints on your underwear. Always great to listen to such cool stories at two in the morning,” the guy crossed his arms on his chest. Lucas’s eyes fell down to a tiny birdy tattoo on his left pec.  


“You have to do something about it. It’s unbearable! They scream like wounded animals.”

“Well, I don’t feel like it.”

“What?!” Lucas bugged his eyes out at his neighbor. “Why?”

Lallemant looked up from the tattoo. Their eyes met. Oh. Lucas didn't recognize the game his neighbor was playing right now. There had to be a reason why he was dragging all those girls into his bed. Though with such stunning appearance, there was no wonder they could not resist. Lallemant was glad he got a chance for a close-up view of that perfect face. It would make it easy to imagine the object of his obsession later. The guy smiled at him, and something snapped inside Lucas. With those eyes and sharp cheeckbones, the guy himself was a forbidden weapon. His smile could make Lucas’s heart jump out of his chest in no time. The neighbor raised his eyebrows and carefully eyed Lucas’s face and hair, and slowly slid down his torso. His eyelids dropped slightly. He pulled away from the doorframe and moved closer to Lallemant.

“If they stop moaning, a cute angry puppy won’t knock on my door again. Now go to sleep. You probably have to wake up early tomorrow,” the guy smiled again, tousled his hair and closed the door. Lucas’s left eye started twitching. He could hear a muffled laugh behind the door. He got back to his room on stiff legs and lay down. The disgusting laughter was still there.

“It’s him. My neighbor is that guy from the canteen,” he texted to James.

“The love has died,” James replied. Lucas decided not to bother him further, turned to his left side and tried to fall asleep.

“Sleep well, puppy.”

“Lord, give me strength.”

Lucas hit the wall with his fist causing another burst of laughter.


	2. Elastic Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation of the original story is done by hakikos and artwork by saluzorra (https://instagram.com/saluzorra?igshid=nnqghivommg9)  
> I’d be really grateful for all your comments and thoughts on the text.  
> I wish you a pleasant reading!

_But you won't see me fall apart_

_Cause I've got an elastic heart_

_I've got an elastic heart_

_Yeah, I've got an elastic heart_

It was quiet today. The asshole behind the wall did not get on Lucas’s nerves and let him have some sleep at last. Except for Lucas could not pass out. He would wake up every 10 minutes and put his ear to the wall listening to every little noise, and then collapse back on the bed, desperately trying to catch some sleep. He was haunted by the feeling that he heard breathing. And when finally his alarm clock went off, he just opened his eyes. Lucas got up and started his morning chores, thoroughly avoiding looking in the mirror. He did not plan to get a heart attack from his own reflection. Not today.

He deliberately did everything slowly to leave his room as late as possible. But he was stalling the inevitable. Not giving a damn about anything, for the hundredth time this morning, he leaned against the wall and froze for a moment to catch any sounds or movements. After making sure his neighbor was not there, Lucas cautiously stepped out of his room and closed the door behind him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a figure disappear around the corner. He took a deep breath, looked at his neighbor's door, and blushed again. Why had not he thought of anything smarter than shutting it down? He screwed up everything he could yesterday. Not to lose time any further, Lucas shook his head and moved towards the stairs. He took a step around the corner and screamed all over the dorm. His neighbor was standing there, staring right at him. All the same perfect, with a mess on his head and a mesmerizing smile. His blue eyes wandered over Lallemant with interest.

“Hey, why are you blushing? Are you okay?” The guy tilted his head slightly and raised his eyebrows. At such a question, Lucas blushed even more and rushed down the stairs without even saying hello. With a look of sheer surprise on his face, the guy immediately ran after Lucas. “Not much of a talker, huh? Cat got your tongue again? Or do you only talk at two in the morning?”

“Fuck off.”

“Hey, I'm serious. Why are you so rude? It was quiet last night,” it took him half a minute to catch up with Lallemant. He was now walking by his side. Lucas tried his best not to match in steps with him. “You’re a head shorter and I still cannot keep up with you. Are you an athlete or something?”

“Are you stupid?”

“Well, no, I’m second in the ranking of my course. And you?”

Lucas stopped abruptly. His neighbor did not have time to react and made two extra steps. This whole situation amused him incredibly. He smiled and sparkled with his beautiful blue eyes, while Lallemant looked like the worst version of Edward Cullen at the moment: he was pale with dark circles under his eyes, his usually perfect posture was gone, and his back twisted into a question mark instead, the shirt was not fully tucked in, and his right shoe got untied. Lucas had no wish to talk, especially to his neighbor; all he wanted right now was killing and drinking blood. And if his neighbor kept terrorizing him, by the end of the day, Lucas would be escorted out of the campus in handcuffs. Lallemant took a step towards his nighttime tormentor and cocked his head, looking straight into his eyes. The day would come when he would have an enemy as tall as he was.

“What do you want from me? Yes, it was quiet last night, thank you very much. I could sleep for the first time in two months. I am so grateful!” The guy smiled warmly at Lucas as if the latter did not throw a tantrum at him. Something inside Lallemant fluttered at that mesmerizing smile. Either a heart or a bat. “But another day will pass, and the thousandth sequel to the Texas Chainsaw Massacre will be released!”

“Well, I’d like to start with making my neighbor presentable,” the guy slightly moved away from Luka. The _homme fatale_ pulled the hem of Lucas’s tucked in shirt and adjusted his backpack so that it did not wrinkle the collar. And in the act of utter insolence, he bent down and tied Lucas's shoe. Lallemant raised his left eyebrow and stared at the entrance of the academic building. He must have been still dreaming. The neighbor stood up and cast an appraising glance at Lucas. “Now that's good. But it would not hurt to wash your hair. I do remember my first year. I was the same.”

"I'm gonna bite your hands off," Lucas said clearly, causing another smile from the guy.

“Sure you have teeth for that, puppy?” Lallemant expected to hear something similar and got himself prepared for that word, yet when he heard it, he just flipped out. He stepped towards the guy who was dying from laughter and grabbed ahold of him. Because of the height difference, they looked utterly ridiculous. Before Lucas could even raise his fist to make some adjustments to that handsome face, someone coughed behind him. Lucas turned around and saw Professor Malcolm. Great, now he would be seen as an ignorant and disrespecting newby and a bully. He quickly let go of his neighbor and stood next to him.

“Mr. Lallemant, would you mind explaining what you are doing to my student?” The man noticed the guys and decided to step in.

“Professor Malcolm! Happy to see you! We're just fooling around. Mr. Lallemant and I are dorm mates. We’ve been trying to figure out whose turn to take a shower is next,” the guy put his hand on Lucas’s shoulder and smiled. Lallemant was distinctly taken aback and started to tremble with rage. He got totally caught with the only desire to push his neighbor’s hand off of him. And what infuriated him most was the reaction of Lucas’s own body: he liked the feeling of the warmth coming from the guy next to him.

“For some reason, you do not sound convincing, Mr. Demaury. And Mr. Lalleman's eyes, open wide with panic, only prove my doubts. I suggest that you finish the article you promised me last week instead of fooling around with freshmen," the professor glanced at Lucas, who had calmed down a bit. Still, his face reflected an utter state of discontent.

“Why, someone’s screaming in the room next door every night. Trying to fall asleep seems to be a lost cause,” the guy said jokingly.

“Sort it out, if you’d be so kind.”

“Yes, sir.”

And the professor left. Lucas and Demaury kept standing frozen like statues. In a moment, Lallemant turned his head, looked down at the hand on his shoulder, and blatantly pushed it off of himself. His neighbor smiled and raised his eyebrow. Lucas was tired. He was not ready to analyze anything. He just wanted to live through the day and get his body back to the dorm afterward. Without saying a word, Lallemant wandered towards the university building.

“I’m Eliott! Eliott Demaury!” Lucas just stopped for a moment and then kept moving forward without looking back at the guy.

Eliott was watching Lucas’s back, and his eyes caught the bag with a big orange inside. He did not expect it from himself. Yesterday that guy was just an annoying neighbor who pounded the wall and looked funny when going wild. But now he had a name. Eliott would definitely visit Emma today to peek at the roster of the first-year students. He might do it instead of going to his first class. That cute blue-eyed puppy with a nasty temper occupied all his thoughts. Eliott could not just pass by such a beautiful flower and not pick it. Moreover, when the flower was growing next door. He remembered Lucas’s gazes the previous night; he just needed to make sure he got them - and Lucas's sexuality - right.

“Mister Lallemant,” Eliott whispered.

He yawned, turned around, and walked to the nearest supermarket. He got a brilliant idea.

***

“No fucking way.”

Lucas stared at the empty shelves of the fridge where bottles of juice usually sat and could not contain his rage. It was a break, and together with James they decided to grab a bite. Despite the sleepless night, Lallemant was full of energy, perhaps because it had been quite an emotional morning. And Lucas could have never thought that day would get even worse. But now, he had to eat his fries without any sauce since not a single one was left on the counter. French fries and broccoli. Yummy. (Not really). The guy swore and stepped aside, waiting for James to pay for his order. His friend gave him a stare that could only mean that he did not get a thing about what was going on. Lucas just turned away and pursed his lips.

“A day without orange juice doesn’t bode well,” Lucas turned red with anger. “I didn’t know the world faces a shortage of oranges.”

“Take a soda, it’s over there,” James pointed at another fridge. “You want one?” Lucas shook his head.

“It’s not healthy. I don’t drink soda. Never have, never will,” he looked at his tray. “Besides, they don’t have an orange one.”

“Oh, come on. You took fries! Why so hypocritical?” James paid and walked away from the counter. He noticed that no one was sitting at the table at which they had had lunch the day before. “Look, our table is free. Get a move on, or it will be taken.”

“I got broccoli. Vegetables are healthy.”

“Sure,” James smiled. “You could take vegetable stew instead of fries.” The guy raised his thin black eyebrows.

“Everything should be balanced. You’re an American here; how could you be against fries, for god’s sake?!” A couple of guys in the line gave them a look. James snorted at the question but said nothing.

They were heading towards the table when Lucas caught the door move out of the corner of his eye, and a second later, there was a loud bang. Eliott entered the canteen. He looked around with a bored expression on his face. Lallemant froze, ducked his head, and almost ran to the target ahead of James. If not for that hasty movement that caught his attention, Demaury would not have noticed Lucas. His eyes opened wide in surprise. Eliott had thought of catching the guy after classes, but Lucas seemed to have a thing for walking the razor’s blade. Demaury turned his gaze to the counter and hurried to get his meal. The break would end in twenty minutes, and he still had time to eat and get to Lallemant. He could be the new Caesar. Yeah. Julius I-can-do-many-things-simultaneously Caesar: the new edition.

“Oh god, he’s here.” Lucas hid behind the pillar. It would definitely be his buddy for the rest of his time here on the campus. Lucas watched Eliott ordering his meal. James decided to support his friend and came behind the pillar as well. They looked ridiculous. “I’ve never met him in two months, and now I keep on bumping into him.”

“You’ve just never paid attention. Come on, let’s have a seat.”

“I wouldn't miss a guy like that.”

“Do you realize you’ve said it out loud?” James pulled the struggling guy to the table. He saw the three girls move towards their table from the far corner of the canteen. “Bro, if they take our table, you’ll have to sit at the table opposite Demaury or on his lap.”

“You go, I’ll eat here,” he frowned. “Nice place. I can eat more while standing.”

Lucas mumbled something and followed his friend. He kept his gaze on Eliott, who was paying at the counter. The girls cursed loudly when they noticed the guys took the table. James smiled triumphantly, and Lucas pursed his lips: for some reason, he felt ashamed. There were no free tables left in the canteen. He did not know if James would be okay to sit together with the girls. But it seemed cruel to him to keep the girls waiting for a free table. However, the girls appeared not to be timid and boldly moved in their direction. One of them, a redhead, put her tray on the table beside them; there was only a bowl of soup. She furrowed her tinted brows. That moment Lucas regretted his being soft-hearted. He sensed the imminent beginning of the carnage.

“Alright, kids, either you’re introducing yourselves, and we sit together, or it’s time to say goodbye.” Lallemant opened his mouth in surprise. The redhead had a brutally low voice, and she reminded him of a grizzly. It was not a part of his plan for today to be killed by a wild animal. He had no strength to fight. Moreover, there were three of them.

“Oh, well, goodbye then!” James waved his hand and started to eat his cutlet. Lucas was not sure if cutlets were popular in the US, but here it seemed to be the only thing James was ready to eat. Lucas just wanted for both of them not to become the very cutlets themselves. The girl’s face became as red as her hair: she did not expect James to fight back. She turned to Lucas, who instinctively sank into his chair. Fighting Demaury vs. fighting girls: feel the difference.

“Hey, shorty with greasy hair, I bet you don’t want to have problems. Take your friend and get out of here. We don’t have much time left for lunch,” she tapped her manicured nails on the table. Lucas imagined them digging into his skin, and swallowed. He looked at James, who had completely forgotten about all of them.

“James…”

“Lucas, are you alright?” James glanced at cowering Lallemant. He did not care at all about the impudent girls, while Lucas looked like he could faint any moment. He began to wonder if it was really worth leaving. He took a deep breath. The redhead narrowed her eyes and smiled nastily. “We have three more classes today. Lucas?” Lallemant turned so pale that his friend became seriously worried.

“Please?” Quietly, almost in a whisper, Lucas asked his friend. At that moment, when an awkward silence fell over the table, a strange girl with colorful makeup and a ponytail turned to them. She was just watching that whole situation. The guys she had been talking to also turned to the table. Lucas thought that the entire canteen was now looking at them.

“You’d better listen to your friend,” the redhead grinned and pushed a chair back, intending to take a seat.

“I don’t think they are friends, Monica,” a brunette behind the redhead giggled. The girls started to laugh. Now Lucas was definitely on the verge of passing out. He looked furiously at James. He was not ashamed of his sexuality, but he did not want to lose a new friend because of mockery. “Who do you think is the top? I bet the brunet. He is not attracted to girls at all…” She paused for a second. “…James, right?”

“I’d rather take vows and join the priesthood if all the girls in Paris are like you.” James had enough time to be done with his cutlet while the confrontation was in full swing. Lucas forgot the very reason why he had come to the canteen. The girls bristled at James. “We can leave if you want. I don't give a damn about them.”

“Okay, let’s go.”

Lucas glanced up at the redhead once again and swallowed. Annoyed, James breathed out and gave the trio a disdainful look. He threw his cutlery on the plate with quite a sound. It was clear to him that something was wrong about this situation with Lallemant: he was not shy, he had a temper, but this time he gave up too fast. But there was nothing he could do about that right now. He shrugged and looked at his friend. Lallemant started to stand up, trying to move his chair as quietly as possible on the slippery floor. But he did not manage to finish his move: someone’s hand lay on his shoulder and pinned him back to his seat. Lucas looked up and saw Eliott’s tense face. He was deftly holding a tray in one hand and Lucas in the other. The guy dropped his gaze to his plate. A disgusting feeling swelled in his chest. The girls' faces changed in an instant.

“Lucas, why are you rude only to me?” He smiled softly. “In the morning you were ready to punch me and insulted me with your barbs and now you cannot stand up for your broccoli? Anyway, don’t worry, I’m here to make sure freshmen on this campus get a chance to have proper lunch.”

“Eliott?” The redhead got petrified.

“Monica, do me a favor, get lost,” he gave her an angry look and pressed his lips. If the bolts of lightning in his eyes were real, Monica would have already been dead. The girls froze in shock. “You are way too confident for someone with heavy makeup and a slimming corset.”

“Monica, did you sleep with him?!” the brunette blushed deeply. At this question the redhead tsked and turned pale.

“As if none of you haven’t.”

Everyone fell silent. Eliott raised his brow.

“Get out.” Demaury did not try to pretend to be polite or hide the irritation in his tone: his lunchtime had been wasted on some stupid stuff. Monica briefly glanced at Lucas.

“See you.”

The three of them turned around and left.

“Do you mind if I sit here?” Eliott stared at Lucas. The latter still did not seem to recover from the shock. He looked at Demaury with his wide blue Bambi eyes, desperately trying to control his emotions. The hand on his shoulder felt like a branding iron, burning his skin. Holding Lucas no longer made sense: he did not intend to leave, partly because his legs gave out and mostly because Eliott was definitely not going to let him go. It was James who saved the situation.

“Do as you please, dude! That was awesome!” at that phrase, Lucas suddenly got back to reality. He shook off Demaury's hand and breathed in convulsively. Eliott turned to James and smiled. For some reason, he was glad to find out that the guys were just good friends. “Where the hell is the Spanish Inquisition when these three witches are walking free?”

“Monica thinks too much of herself. But she takes off her clothes, and all her complexes become literally visible,” Demaury leaned back in his chair and glanced at Lucas, who finally got out of his daze and slowly started to eat his fries. Being cold and without sauce, they left much to be desired. “What's your next class? By the way, my name is Eliott Demaury. I'm Lucas's neighbor."

“How on earth did you manage to find us?” Lucas whispered and gazed at his plate.

“I’m James. Why does everyone keep telling me their last name here when introducing themselves?” he watched his new acquaintance casting glances at Lucas every now and then while the latter was ready to bury his face in the fries. “Next is a math seminar. I like it, but gosh, I’d rather we spend some time in the gym or anything instead.”

“I can understand. Lucas, why didn’t you get a sauce for fries?” Lallemant gave him the stink eye and turned away. “Hm. You seem to have rapid mood swings sometimes with no reason for that,” Demaury looked like a little angel, whose halo rested on long horns. “Lucas, why didn't you get a sauce?” he asked again.

“Because damn cavemen ransacked the canteen! No sauce, no juice, and on top of it those three mops led by a pitiful parody of Disney’s ‘Brave’ eager to make us leave our table!” Lucas grumbled loudly. Both James and Eliott laughed at such a harsh reply.

Eliott put a piece of meat into his mouth and flashed his eyebrows at Lucas, who blushed but diligently kept eating his fries. Demaury opened his backpack and took out a bottle of ketchup. James opened his eyes and mouth wide in a silent question. The guy squeezed a bit of it onto Lucas’s plate and then onto his own. Lallemant looked up at him, totally confused. Demaury was smiling wide as if he had just won gold at the Olympics: that was the reaction he had hoped for. All freshmen seemed funny and ridiculous to Eliott. However, Lucas had no idea what was coming.

“I always take a bottle of sauce with me just in case. Usually, after 11 am you won’t find anything here. Once we had one small sauce package for five of us. Well, I’ve seen life and I know what to expect.” He focused on eating. They had not more than 5 minutes left before the end of the break: Eliott had spent too much time on the insolent girls. Without pausing the process, he shoved his hand in the bag and placed a bottle of orange juice in front of Lucas along with a chocolate bar with the same filling. James burst into laughter. He was so loud that the entire canteen heard him laugh. “And don’t forget a bottle of water and some snacks. Otherwise, you run the risk of staying hungry for the rest of the day if the line is too long.”

“Dude, he’s just beaten you! If you don’t take this juice, I’ll laugh myself sick,” James was banging on the table with his palm and paid no attention to other students staring at him. The girl with a ponytail watched them again. “Juice! They bought up all the orange juice! It’s only 11 am! All the juice!” James started to mock Lucas.

“Are you a stalker? Have you been eavesdropping on me?”

“You’ve been too loud. Now everyone in the canteen knows that you like oranges and hate other students, long lines and 11 am,” his friend was not supportive at all.

“Oh, don’t bug me, man,” Lucas waved at James. “Seriously, how did you find out? If only the juice, I would think it’s just the coincidence, but the chocolate?”

“I saw your backpack with a big orange in it this morning. You don’t have to be a genius to figure it out.” Eliott was done with his meal and glanced at the broccoli. The bell rang. Lucas glared at James, who opened his mouth to say another barb, and quickly stuffed all the broccoli into his mouth. He looked like a hamster in a granary. Elliott choked on air. “Do you want a sip?”

“I’ll manage.”

“Bro, you’re going to choke,” Lucas failed to cope with the vegetables in his mouth. He was running out of air, and it was difficult to breathe through the nose. Rolling his eyes and admitting defeat, he opened the bottle and took a sip. Suddenly he tasted the nectar of the gods. The guy could not hold back a soft moan of pleasure when the fluid moistened his dry throat. Elliott watched his Adam's apple and felt like a wolf before a fatal leap: its movements were rhythmical and too seductive. James gazed at them. “Someone is definitely the third wheel here.” Elliott smiled at James.

“Gosh. Thank you,” Lucas blushed slightly and looked at the half-empty bottle. He felt embarrassed that he had raided his neighbor’s stocks. “Oh, I’m sorry! I got carried away. How much did it cost? I’ll pay for that. It’s really tasty, I’ll keep this brand in mind for the future.”

“Nothing. It’s yours. I’m not a fan of orange juice,” Eliott stared into Lucas's eyes like a boa constrictor, waiting for a reaction to his words. However, Lallemant just smiled slightly, reached for the bottle, and put it in his backpack. Eliott did not like orange juice, therefore Lucas would take it. He was tight on money. “And don’t forget the chocolate. You have three more classes today.”

“What’s this game you are playing, Eliott?” Lucas carefully took the chocolate bar. “You know… I’m… It’s… Never mind. Thanks anyway. But don’t think tha…” he flinched after his incoherent speech. "James, we should get going." His friend nodded.

Demaury said nothing. He kept gazing at the place where Lucas had sat and started to ask this question himself. The guys had left, but Eliott could not make himself stand up. The canteen was empty now, so nobody would force him to leave. He did not like silence. Music in the background, people talking, birds singing, anything but silence. It brought up terrible memories. Demaury licked his lips and looked out the window. With a heavy exhale he took out his phone.

“Lucas Lallemant. Let’s see.”

***

Eliott came out of his room and looked around. There was no one in the hallway. Sure thing, no one would fancy wandering around the dorm at 1 am. Demory was a night owl, an evening person for as long as he could remember, so he had just skipped morning classes during his first year. That had caused him lots of troubles, but his quick wit and natural talent for the profession always got him out of the mess, and everyone had tried to express their sympathy when they had seen those black circles under his eyes. The guy had only his shorts on, a towel over his shoulder, and a small toiletry case in his hand. In that dorm, unlike many others, they were allowed to shower whenever they wanted. Eliott was never ashamed of his body. He maintained a more or less healthy lifestyle and had regular basketball trainings. And he had no patience to wait for a free cabin; that’s why taking a shower at night was a perfect option. And the bird's nest on his head should be washed regularly.

He entered the changing room and got undressed. His eyes caught somebody’s clothes on the bench. The showers in the dorm had the same design of six cabins with high thick partitions. Eliott would have paid no attention to a midnight stranger if not the dog print boxers on the bench. He recalled that the first time he had seen similar boxers, there were red dogs on a black background; this time, the print was the same, but the colors were different – black and white. Demaury opened the door to the showers: the steam filled the space. Someone was humming softly to the sound of pouring water, and that voice was beautiful. Smiling wide, Demaury narrowed his eyes, trying to figure out which cabin was occupied. The last one, just as he had expected. He quietly walked into the next to last one and turned on the water. The humming stopped at once. Elliott smiled softly. The guy knew about the unspoken rule of silence in the WC, but that was not relevant for showers.

“You said you have underwear with different prints,” the movement behind the partition stopped and Eliott could hear a doomed sigh. 

“Of course it’s you,” Lucas said softly. After a few seconds, he added in a louder and more embarrassed tone, “Did you go through my underwear?!”

“You threw your boxers on the bench. I just noticed them, is all. I didn't do anything to your stuff, don’t worry,” Eliott adjusted the temperature and stepped into the shower. Good water pressure was another indisputable advantage of doing that at night. Nobody stole water from him, and he was ready to share it with Lucas. He got relaxed and forgot for a moment that Lucas was standing in the next cabin. “You’ve never taken the keyboard back from me. Why did you bring it at all?”

“I…,” for a second, Lucas wondered if he should answer him at all. Maybe it would be better to ignore him for now and avoid any possible contacts further. Lucas had already been struggling with obsession every time Eliott looked at him. Swooning over his voice was the last thing Lucas needed. Demaury had been nice and sweet over the day, and Lucas had been was all nasty. Hmm, his karma was fucked up. “The other day, I had to be at my math class at 8 am. The night before, you’d been hooking up with your Sicilian siren, and I hadn’t slept a wink. So I ended up passing out right during the class, face down the keyboard. I was asked to fix it or bring a new one.”

“Do you blame it on me?” Eliott smiled. Teasing Lucas was fun. He had been known him for just a day but he already started to get a taste of it.

“Harder! More! God! Yeah!” Lallemant started to parody the girl. He was trying to make it caricature, but it still sounded dirty. Eliott tensed up. He was ready to admit that sex indeed was such a big part of his life that it turned into a routine. And Lucas’s moanings, even fake ones, brought up unexpected emotions and desire in him. After all, they were both standing there naked and wet, separated only by a partition. Lucas’s mocking voice dragged him out of his thoughts. “It was when I asked you to gag her with a sock. With such screams you can really wake the dead. So you owe me a keyboard.”

“It wasn’t me screaming, but you can call Jacqueline,” Eliott tried to remember if it had been Jacqueline at all. He really tried not to meet the same girl twice, finding them somewhere on the side to avoid any chance of running into each other accidentally. Or to be chased by them, like during his first year, oh, that was an experience. He had grown. “If it was Jacqueline. I’m not sure. What can I do? I'm too good.”

“I recorded and sent the moans of your yesterday’s girl to James. Guess what he called you? Hannibal. It’s not the way people have sex, Eliott. It’s how they dismember someone. I still wonder why you didn’t end up in the police station,” Lucas worked some shampoo into a lather in his palms again. Everyone and their dog reproached him for his greasy hair today. Well, they would be soft and silky from now on.

“And how do they have sex, Lucas?” Eliott asked almost inaudibly.

Lucas felt hot, and not because of the water temperature. He had been already covered in red at Eliott’s first question. Now the guy asked him directly about sex. In all fairness, it was Lallemant who had turned the conversation this direction. He should not have mentioned Eliott’s girlfriends. Lucas looked down at his feet, trying to concentrate and come up with some witty and caustic reply, but his imagination let him down. As his mother used to say: "When imagination is poor and lies are obvious, tell the truth." Lallemant gave it a serious thought. If Eliott found out the guy was still a virgin, he would laugh out loud for days. And Lucas decided that he would describe how he imagined his first time. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind his ear.

“I believe that sex is more than just physical contact. Sex without love is masturbation, well, with the help of another person. Nothing in this world can bring you so much warmth and be as dear to you as your significant other. Nothing is more precious. Your girls are screaming because they want to announce to the whole dorm, ‘I'm in Eliott Demaury's bed!’," he paused for a second. “They probably want to flatter you, but...” Lucas broke off again and took a shuddering breath. Eliott became all ears. For some reason, he desperately needed to know Lucas’s opinion. “But... Love is silent. It’s in deeds. There’s no need to scream, moan or climb a wall to show it. It is enough just to look into the most beautiful eyes, to breathe the same air, to be a personality, but at the same time feel whole and complete when you are together… That is what sex is for me, Eliott. And your tone-deaf women try to arrange an operetta. My poor ears.”

“You’re a romantic. Your girlfriend will be very lucky,” Eliott knew that Lucas was gay; he had made inquiries. And Lucas had been giving Eliott ‘that very look.’ The phrase was said rather to make sure that he was right.

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

Eliott got speechless. He did not expect such a reply, did not expect Lucas to just agree. He had envisioned it differently with dancing under a rainbow flag, marching in protest and standing for his rights to the last breath. That was how he saw Lucas from aside. He squeezed out some orange-scented shampoo and applied it to his hair. All his thoughts now were occupied by Lucas who was hiding his sexuality from him. Did Demaury look like a homophobe? Well, yes, he preferred girls, but he was fond of exotics as well. He felt a bit hurt by Lucas's mistrust: he could bet the guy had already come out of the closet to James. Eliott lathered, rinsed and repeated, but his questions were still there. He was reluctant to ask Lucas directly though: there might have been more serious reasons lurking behind his secret. And Demaury was capable of understanding it. He respected personal boundaries.

“What do you have with professor Malcolm?”

“Not sex, I promise,” Eliott heard a hiss behind the partition. He laughed, banishing the gloomy thoughts. “He is my supervisor. He’s really cool. Never forgets anything, like a walking computer,” Demaury fibbed a little.

“Oh, crap.”

“Why? You’ve just started. He will hammer higher maths into your head for the next 3 semesters.”

“I fell asleep and snored in the middle of his lecture on the damn day when his class was the first one.” Eliott burst out laughing behind the partition. Lucas was struck by the feeling of deja vu: the laugh behind the wall followed him. “Stop it. If I don’t pass, I’ll burn down your room door.”

“You’ll pass.” For some reasons Eliott was sure as hell in that.

Lucas missed his reply – he was not there. He peered at the small blue tiles and thought about the wall. Funny that there was always something that separated the two of them in space: a wall between their rooms, a partition between shower cabins, a pillar in the canteen. Lucas smelled sweet oranges. His own shower gel and shampoo smelled pretty much the same, but Lallmant could feel the difference. So Eliott had lied about oranges: he liked them. Lucas put his palm on the partition that hid him from Demaury. It was much thicker than the wall in his room but way thinner than the invisible barrier between them. Luсas chuckled. He had been drifting in his heavy thoughts for good five minutes when Eliott's insistent voice brought him out of his trance. Well, that was about time to be done with hydrotherapy, but he had no idea how to leave unnoticed.

“Lucas, cat got your tongue again?”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Why did you panic in the canteen?”

It was high time he had left.

“I didn’t expect that. I… I cannot confront a stranger who suddenly appears out of nowhere,” Lucas lied through his teeth and was ready to go all the way with that. First, he did not come out of the closet to Eliott, which a priori meant that Eliott could not have an idea about him being gay. And second, he was not going to open up to someone he hardly knew. It seemed that Demaury had a trait of not being shy to ask personal questions. It was all a joke to him, or so Lucas thought. “We’re freshmen, we don’t want any trouble.”

“James did not seem to care,” Eliott smiled bitterly. So, they started to play the game who was going to be the first to be caught in a lie. He hated such situations where everyone knew the truth, but kept on lying. “Monica had always had a bad temper. She’s vindictive. I think it really has to do with her complex about her appearance.”

“So why did you sleep with her?”

“Well, she looks pretty in makeup… Just kidding. It was my second year, I was getting a taste of student life.” Another lie.

“Eliott?”

“Yes?” For the first time his name sounded with no mockery, no evil context, or accompanying curses. And Demaury liked it. Suddenly he was eager to listen to the sound of his name coming from Lucas over and over again. Lallemant was only glad he managed to put an unpleasant topic aside. And he wanted to leave before someone came in.

“Do you promise not to look when I get out of the shower and go get dressed?”

“While you’re putting on your dog print boxers?” Lucas rolled his eyes.

“Exactly.”

“Only if you promise to wait for me in return,” Lucas knew it would not be easy to deal with this man.

Never.

“Okay.”

Grabbing his toiletries, Lucas ran out of the cabin, trying to cover his naked body as much as he could and not throwing a glance at Eliott. Demaury did not even think to look at him: it would have been weird. Lallemant ran into the changing room and hastily dried off with a towel. He was in such a hurry as if a flock of hyenas was chasing him. While it was just Eliott standing in the shower. There was something about him. Having caught his breath and dressed, Lucas looked at the door. He could leave, and no one would accuse him of lying. He took a step towards the exit but could not bring himself to take the second one. He heard the water in the shower turn off and immediately turned away, closing his eyes. Eliott walked in, stared at the guy whose face was red as a beet, and smiled. Lucas should have covered his ears with his hands to complete the look. Eliott deliberately made a loud slap with an elastic waistband as he put on his boxers with a raccoon print.

“Hey, open your eyes, or you’ll walk into the door. Lucas?” The guy did not react immediately. He opened one eye a little bit and exhaled, making sure that Demaury was not standing in front of him au naturel. He could expect anything from Eliott.

“Raccoon?”

“Why? You’re not the only one who can have underwear with animal prints,” Demaury shot a look at Lucas and nodded towards the door. Lallemant hurried to leave: too many emotions for one day. “Why are we discussing our underwear for the second time in the middle of the night? That’s weird,” Eliott smiled. “But I will be pleased if you call me raccoon. Sounds nice to me.”

“Ask your women to call you so.”

“Oh, no, thank you. I don’t want half of the dorm to think that we’re filming zoo porn in here,” Eliott chuckled. Lucas had enough time to think over one particularly interesting question while they were walking towards their rooms.

“They never scream your name. Why? They usually sound like in low-quality porn movies, and I’ve never heard them calling you. For two months, your identity remained a mystery to me.” They stopped facing each other in front of the doors to their rooms.

“That’s my rule for them – not to _call me by my name_. There were a couple of times when I kicked girls out of my room in the middle of sex because they didn’t believe I was serious about that,” Eliott’s face turned gloomy. Lucas was surprised at this change in his mood. And they called Lucas volatile and unsteady.

“But why?” he looked at Eliot a bit naively, and the latter almost opened up to Lucas but stopped at the last moment and shut his mouth.

“And why didn’t you fight Monica back?” Demaury raised his eyebrow defiantly.

“Goodbye, Eliott,” Lucas opened his door and slipped into the room. There was a chuckle, but not that nasty this time.

Lucas threw his toiletries on the floor and decided to take care of them tomorrow. For now, he was exhausted. Despite a sleepless night, he had had no time for a nap when he had got back to the dorm because of heaps of homework. And back then, he had had no will to sleep, like at 6 am. But now, he was no longer a bundle of nerves; he relaxed and felt drowsy. Lucas sat on the bed and crawled under the blanket. A pleasant shiver ran through his body. He glanced at the wall that separated him from Eliott. Right now, right behind it, Demaury was going to bed, too. And this time, he was all alone. Lucas put his hand on the painted surface.

“Good night, puppy.”

“Seriously, I have other prints!”

“I do believe you!”

“Good night…”


	3. Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys,  
> thanks for reading this story and hope you enjoy it so far!  
> A message from the translator [hakikos]: I am not a native speaker (still I'm doing my best!), so if you see anything that sounds too weird to you, don't hesitate to shout it out, okay? I'd really appreciate.  
> The art to this chapter is done by amelie.liberte (https://www.instagram.com/amelie.liberte/)  
> Stay safe in these crazy times, and hope you'll like the development of the plot.

I like that you're broken  
Broken like me  
Maybe that makes me a fool  
I like that you're lonely  
Lonely like me  
I could be lonely with you

Lucas was walking between the supermarket shelves, swearing every second step. He cursed Paris for being one of the most expensive cities in Europe. Shopping had always been stressful for him. Living on a very tight budget, he got nervous every time he found himself among such abundance. Of course, he wanted much more than he could afford. And what is worse, he had to come back here quite often and suffer. His daily spendings did not let him eat out three times a day, so lunch in the canteen was his maximum. Therefore, he had to cook in the dorm’s kitchen and limit his portions to barely sufficient amounts. But that was the routine task he had been performing brilliantly. Lucas was a terrible cook, that was why he ate just little bits of his molecular cuisine only because he had no other choice. So he had to either consume his masterpieces of undercooked pasta, burned rice, stale bread, or faint in the middle of the day and make barbaric forays into other students’ supplies.

The guy looked at his cart. So far, it contained only a box of pasta, a pack of bulgur, two apples, an orange, and some lettuce. Lucas glanced at the shelf with juices and sighed as it was not something he could casually buy. He just had to get by during these hard times, later he could indulge in everything he wanted. His eyes caught sight of a bottle of orange ambrosia that Eliott had given him the other day. He saw the price and suddenly got short of breath. Alright, when he gets a job with a decent salary, he would definitely pay Eliott back. A fucking bottle of juice cost almost his daily budget. He had never imagined living through his student years would be so damn hard. Lucas tried to stay focused; there were still some items on his shopping list. Like tea. A package that had 20 tea bags and cost less than a euro. His grandpa used to say that an infusion of fallen leaves that one picked out in the street would taste better than this tea. Well, Lucas was ready to confirm it. Not willing to tear his heart further apart, he made a step forward and raised his eyes just to freeze in place with an open mouth.

Some five steps ahead of him, in front of a shelf with sauces, stood Eliott. He was frowning as though he couldn't make a choice. And he looked so good, better than usual. Not that Lucas had lots of contact with him, but he still noticed that the skin pallor and dark circles under his eyes were gone. He looked more alive. His cart was half full, and Lucas could only envy. The guy was not going to reveal his presence and tried to escape silently, but at the very moment he moved to go away, Eliott turned to him as if by magic. A smile that appeared on Eliott’s face seemed to become a common reaction on Lucas. He moved towards Lucas, and the latter breathed out spastically. Lallemant thought that checking clothes for any tracking device would be a good idea. It was too suspicious that he ran into the same person so often. Meanwhile, Demaury slightly pushed Lucas’s cart to draw his attention.

“I noticed you ten minutes ago. How on earth do you spend forever choosing a pack of juice and leave empty-handed? Time is precious, and you’re just wasting it,” Eliott’s face showed surprise and perplexity.

“I… I was just watching. Need some basic stuff,” Lucas tried to sound careless, but Eliott still looked down at his cart. He said nothing; he did not want to embarrass Lucas with further questions. They moved further to the shelves with tea and coffee. Well, Lucas headed there, Eliott followed. “Are you going to stalk me?”

“Kinda.”

“Right, you’ve been watching me for the last ten minutes. No sign of scruples.” Lucas came closer to the shelf with different colorful packages. He knew what he could afford: strawberry or lemon flavor. Frankly speaking, he was sick of both. He shot Eliott a sideways glance to find out that Demaury was picking something in the area with the most expensive brands. “What kind of tea do you prefer?”

“Black. I don’t care for the flavor as long as it doesn’t contain thyme.” Eliott picked a small box from the shelf and threw it into his cart. “And you? Which one do you like? Just please don’t say a word about oranges or orange zest, or I will call a doctor to arrange an appointment for you.” Ouch, that actually hurt.

“My bed linen has an orange print.” Lucas had no idea why he blurted it out. Instead of dropping everything and calling a psychiatric ambulance, Eliott did his best not to reach out and ruffle Lucas’s hair - he was so cute, admitting his obsession! “OK, I’ll take strawberry-flavored.” It was going to be the first case of suicide because of depression caused by horrible tea. “I don’t see a single package of banana-flavored tea.” Nice try, Lucas, this brand had no banana flavor at all. “It tastes good, really. I don’t like bananas, but banana-flavored tea is something. I like these food tricks.”

“Food tricks?” They started to move slowly to the checkout counter.

“Yeah, like cheese-flavored chips don’t taste like cheese exactly.” And Lucas enthusiastically plunged into a discourse on dozens of cheese types and how they are different from just ‘cheese flavor.’ “Oh, and I cannot understand people who like olives. Yuck! Why did Persians wage wars with Greece at all? Cliffs and olives, that’s all you get there. First, you try olives, get disappointed with this life, and then jump off the cliff, that’s it.”

“You’re a real Frenchman, Lucas. Too much information about cheese. And even more on chips.” Eliott smiled and, as if by accident, blocked the aisle not to let Lucas run away. “They say you have to get old enough to be able to enjoy olives. I only like the green ones.”

“You’re such a perv,” Lucas winced, “I have to report it to the police.” Eliott burst out laughing.

They packed their groceries, quickly exchanged glances, and headed towards the dorm. It was not that far from the store, but it would take them a good 10 minutes to walk. Lucas wondered if Eliott would start playing his game again. After their talk in the shower, Lucas felt more at ease around Eliott; still ‘goodnight’ from him had been playing on repeat in Lucas’s head, spreading warmth in his chest. Demaury was walking in silence. He held two big bags in one hand and a lit cigarette in the other. From time to time, he turned around to see if anyone noticed them. A beautiful sunny day and casual company kept his mood up. He glanced at frowning Lucas, who was engrossed in his phone. A perfect excuse to start a conversation.

“Why are you so tense?”

“My schoolmate Yann is not going to the party. His grandmother is sick, and he has to stay with her. I have already received tons of messages from him whining that he’s gonna miss it, and he won’t be a freshman ever again and all. I don’t see a problem here,” Lucas was emotional and spoke so fast that it was not that easy for Eliott to follow him. “I don’t understand why he is so upset. It’s just a party, no big deal. More problems than fun.”

“So you’re basically saying you are not going to be there?” Eliott’s eyes widened. All freshmen were eager to be invited. Usually, such a party would be thrown in a mansion rented specially for this event, so that was enough room for everyone. But not only freshmen were eager to get there - other students as well. As a result, if half of the guests at the party were freshmen, that could be counted as a success. “Lucas, you have to go! This is the event of the year, trust me. How are you going to join the real student life otherwise?”

“Quietly,” he glanced at Eliott. “Anyway, what am I supposed to do there alone?”

“You’re not going to be alone, I will be there,” Eliott raised his eyebrows. He needed Lucas to know that. Sure as hell Eliott would be there. He could not skip the biggest party where he could catch so many new innocent (and not so very) fish in his nets. They made a turn - the dorm was in sight now, and Lucas felt much better knowing this torture would soon be over.

“Sounds more like a disadvantage,” Lucas wondered if he had anything proper in his wardrobe to wear for such an occasion at all. Eliott's persuasion made him question his decision to stay home. It was Friday, there was no need to wake up early the next day. He could have fun and maybe make friends with someone else, not to go completely crazy around Eliott. Hopefully, James could make it to the party.

“C’mon, it’s gonna be fun. What’s the point in sitting home sipping strawberry tea on Friday night?” That was the last and the strongest reason for Lucas to capitulate. But he just could not say ‘yes’ and be done with that. Stubborn was his middle name.  
“That’s exactly how I’ve been living for the last couple of months.” They reached the dorm, and Eliott opened the door to let Lucas in. The latter snorted and passed by the guy. Demaury wanted to do the whole gentleman act? Perfect, so much the better for Lucas.

“Never thought there’s such a daredevil living next door.” A bit of sarcasm never hurt anyone.

“You know, I spent two months trying to find a pattern in your sex life, and I failed. Your girls could start screaming at 3 am, the next day at 11 pm, and then right before the sunrise. Even a cock on a farm has more consistency.” They stepped up the stairs. Demaury felt no guilt at all, he had not caused any troubles, he had always stayed quiet.

“Did you sleep well last night?”

“Oh, shut up.”

And what was he supposed to say? They had taken a shower the night before and then gone to their rooms. No girls had been expected. And that was the reason Lucas felt so well-rested. Lucas could not recall the last time when that had happened before yesterday. Maybe Eliott is right, and he should go to that party. They came up to their room doors. Lucas decided to ask James: if he was coming to the party, Lucas would go, too. He did not want to appear in front of all the students together with Eliott. He guessed that the canteen incident had already been spread throughout his faculty; if he came to the party with Eliott alone, everyone would think of Lucas as of Eliott’s new toy. Lucas could not do that to himself, thus James was his last hope to come to the party and avoid rumors.

“See you soon?” Eliott asked softly.

“Sure thing. You’re a maniaс spying on me, and we study in the same building. There’s no chance I can avoid seeing you soon.” Right, this world needs more sarcasm! But at that moment, Lucas was smiling, and Eliott could not help smiling back. He opened his door and winked at the guy. Not to give away his embarrassment, Lucas rolled his eyes, chuckled, and walked into his room.

He closed the door and threw his bag on the bed. He glanced quickly at the toiletries on the floor which he was supposed to put in place, texted James, and decided to do a quick cleaning. Usually it helped him to focus and calm down. He was done in some five minutes (nobody had promised to perform a painstaking work after all), still, he silently praised himself and sat down on the bed. In an instant, his face lit up with dazzling happiness: he remembered about a bar of chocolate Eliott had given him the day before. Oh, he was going to savor it! Lucas began rummaging through his bag, swearing at the mess he had in it. When finally he managed to find his chocolate, he got back to the bed, leaned against the wall, and slowly unwrapped it, humming with satisfaction. While Lucas hesitated between devouring the whole bar in one go or eating it in small pieces to make the pleasure last, his phone blinked with a notification of an incoming message from James.

Elliot entered the room and looked around. The same neatly made bed, sorted books, a laptop, and a stack of paper with printed articles next to it. But Eliott was looking for a different thing - his sketchbook. Since the first time Lucas had knocked on his door, he could not help thinking of anything but drawing. Drawing something about Lallemant. There were a couple of hours left before the party, his outfit had been prepared long ago, and Eliott made the decision to take up his long-forgotten hobby instead of working on an article. You can never rely on inspiration to come in time.

When his fingers touched the cover of the book, something fluttered in Eliott’s chest. He did not even look through his old works, instead, he started to quickly outline everything that came to his mind, hands trembling with anticipation. In some of the drawings, Lucas was pictured as a puppy, but his true self did not fit that at all. Eliott was tearing sheet after sheet out of the book, tossing the crumpled paper to the floor. He stopped at the seventeenth, sighed resignedly, and covered his face with hands. He imagined Lucas, his mimic, the way he moved, the way he talked. It dawned on him unexpectedly, and it was straight to the point: Lucas looked like a cute little hedgehog. He bristled when angry or afraid and did not easily open up to others.

After that, it all went faster. They did not have lots of moments together in the last couple of days, but enough to cover five pages in sketches. Eliott looked at the last one with keen interest: Lucas, as a hedgehog, was holding his small grocery package while Eliott, as a raccoon, had large bags in hands. And suddenly, it was obvious that Lucas did not have much food in store. Eliott frowned and put the sketchbook aside. He cast a glance at the bags which he left on the floor under the table. His tea cost, well, as much as everything Lucas had bought put together. An unpleasant feeling settled in Eliott’s stomach. He jumped from his bed and started to walk in circles around the room. He needed to find a way to hand over some of his purchases to Lucas without consequences. And the only idea that fitted the plan was threats.

“Oh, crap.” Lucas pressed the ‘Send’ button and sighed bitterly. The reply came in an instant.

“What happened? A moment ago, everything was fine, what’s wrong now?” For the last twenty minutes, they had been arguing about whether Lucas should go to the party or not. James was getting ready and eager to get there: it turned out he was invited to sing a couple of songs.

“I’ve just eaten up my chocolate bar. I hoped it would last longer, but, man, twenty minutes is my maximum. Goddamn Eliott.” He added three crying smileys to the text. Unconsciously he listened to catch any sound from behind the wall, but it was quiet. His phone buzzed with the reply.

“Dude, he was the one who gave it to you.”

“Well, he tempted me!” Lucas smiled. “Have you picked up what you will wear to the party yet? I’m at a loss. Can you swing by maybe? Thirty minutes before the party? If you have time, that is.”

“Sure thing, why?”

“Eliott invited me to the party as well, and I don’t want for us to be seen coming together. I am positive there have been gossips spreading since yesterday. He has a reputation for being a playboy, I don’t want to wind up in the list of ‘lucky’ ones,” Lucas really meant it. That was probably the main reason he resisted Eliott’s charm – he did not want to be one of many. He did not even ask what year Eliott was in. He did not want to get a stigma for the next four years. Why couldn't Demaury magically stop popping up on every corner? Just like before.

“Are you afraid of showing up with another celebrity?”

“I’m afraid to end up on the front page of tabloids.”

“Done, dude, I’ll be at yours in half an hour. We’ll pick up something for your killer look. Maybe this party will kick Eliott out of your head. Okay, I need to go now. See you!” James went offline, not waiting for Lucas’s reply.

“See you.”

At that moment, someone knocked on the door. Lucas was surprised. He tried to catch any sound from behind the wall, but it had been quiet in there, and nobody had slammed the door. He got out of bed, glanced in the mirror, and made sure he looked more or less presentable. The quiet night and some good sleep were definitely good for him. Lucas opened the door but found no one there. With a chuckle, he was about to close it when he looked down. There was a paper grocery bag on the floor. Lallemant stuck his head out into the hallway again, but it was still suspiciously empty. On top of the bag, there was a small piece of folded paper. Lucas carefully took it, open and saw a little hedgehog drawing with a sack in his hands inside. The hedgehog was smiling, and Lucas immediately knew from those eyes painted in bright blue who served as the prototype. A righteous thought to return the package to Eliott flashed in his mind, but Lucas got distracted by a small arrow asking him to turn the paper over. There it was, blackmailing in its pure form:

“If you don’t take it, I’ll bring in a student choir and have an orgy.”

“Don’t worry, it’s on your tab.”

At the bottom below the text was a small figure of a shrugging raccoon. Lucas wanted to roll his eyes in annoyance but felt a smile appear on his face instead. He was smiling so wide that his cheekbones ached. He opened the bag and noticed a bottle of juice, marshmallows, and a package of good black tea. Lallemant quickly took it and hid inside the room. The last thing he needed now was to burst into tears like a child in the middle of the corridor. The bag turned out to be much heavier than it looked at first glance. So there must have been a lot more in it that he managed to see. Lucas gently closed the door. He put the bag down next to his groceries and took out an orange. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome Lucas, a twenty-first-century Esmeralda who you can buy for an orange and a pack of tea. He sat down on the bed and leaned against the cool wall. He started to peel the fruit but then stopped, getting his thoughts together.

“Thank you, Eliott.”

But Demaury did not hear that. He stood around the corner as if struck by lightning and could not move. Students passed by and cast worried glances at him. He looked like a crazy stalker. Eliott was hiding around the corner on purpose. First, to watch Lucas’s reaction, and second, if the guy thought of returning the bag, his attempts would lead to nothing. So he stood there in his shorts and a T-shirt, trying to hold back a smile. The only thing Eliott could think of at that moment was Lallemant’s happy face. He was happy about such a small thing, about something that Elliott’s life was so full of that it meant nothing to him. He was right about Lucas’s totem animal. Right now, he felt the urge to make another drawing. And that was what finally dragged Eliott out of his thoughts and made him return to his room and grab a sketchbook. He still had time to get dressed properly. All he could think of now was that smile and those sparkling eyes.

***

  
Let’s face it: Lucas had terrible friends, except for the pillar. Yann never showed up; James dumped him the moment they entered. And Eliott... Only Eliott met the criteria for being a good friend. A friend who meanwhile was devouring him with his eyes. He did not stalk him, did not try to stay in sight or bother him in any way. Probably he was trying to avoid a confrontation over the package he had left in front of his door earlier. Truth be told, Lucas had no intent to go at him about that. He saw in Eliott’s act nothing more than a usual desire to help another person. The guy had managed to find the right words to write in a note to handle Lallemant’s pride, anger, and embarrassment. And that cute drawing... Lucas had pinned it in the most prominent spot in his room. It was so cute that he simply could not have done otherwise. James had been tactful not to ask anything. Well, Lucas had been lucky with friends so far! That friend mentioned above was singing right now somewhere Lucas had no idea where exactly. He wanted to listen to James, but the house was too big, and he wasn’t drunk enough to dare to communicate with strangers in order to find out where the guy was.

Luсas had to admit it at least to himself: the party was great. Alcohol and weed were freely available, the music was good. Pity Lucas was too constrained. He had been sipping his glass of beer for almost an hour and idly scanning the crowd for any familiar face. When he was done with his beer, he mentally clapped his hands in self-irony. He got up from the couch and set off to the bar. Maybe if he got blackout drunk, he would find new friends or someone he could be more than friends with. It took him twenty minutes to squeeze through the crowd, grab a beer and get back to his secluded spot. He had had lots of feelings for inanimate objects lately. Now, in addition to the pillar, a big couch on which he had sat all alone had been added to the list of his friends.

When Lallemant reached the couch, he grimaced unconsciously. Well, on second thought, it was only the pillar that remained on the list: his former friend, the couch, was now in a close relationship with Eliott, who rested on it. Eliott with three girls. They laughed sweetly and chatted carelessly about nothing. One of the girls was sitting on Demaury’s lap. When Lucas heard her squeaky voice, he realized that he would not get any shut-eye that night. At that moment, the raccoon drawing came to his mind. His grasp on the glass tightened. Taking out his fury at the asshole neighbor on some hard plastic was a great idea. Eliott noticed Lucas the moment he appeared. He watched Lallemant’s jealousy under his eyebrows but gave no sign he saw him. Demaury’s heart somersaulted: Lucas was wearing tight jeans and a black shirt. He looked way better than in his usual baggy hoodies. One of the girls suddenly ran her fingers through Eliott’s hair and distracted his attention from Lallemant, but Eliott had lost his interest in them. Lucas put on a poker face and sat on the other side of the couch.

“Ladies, meet Lucas, my neighbor.” It was much quieter in this part of the mansion, thus he did not have to shout over the music. Lucas turned to Eliott and frowned: the latter must have been mocking him. All three girls were watching him with interest.

“Eliott, he’s so cute! Is he a freshman? Aww, look at this kid!” One of the girls sat down close beside him. In an instant, Lucas tensed even more. That was the worst-case scenario. Eliott arched a brow in question: the guy really had problems dealing with women. But Demaury would be lying if he said he was not angry. He had no intention to find Lucas a girlfriend, he just wanted to tease him. “Why didn't you bring him with you?”

“Dunno,” Eliott was nervous. He no longer felt like himself: his own jealousy was not part of his plan.

“Eliott. You promised. In a note. You promised,” Lallemant uttered in staccato bursts. He just wanted this girl to stop burning him with her hip and frightening him with her lustful eyes. Lucas felt like a bunny grabbed by his ears and pulled out of a magician’s hat.

“What did you promise? He looks so sweet when blushing! I adore freshmen,” she was going to put her hand on his shoulder, but Lallemant drowned in the couch cushions, trying to escape her sticky tentacles. Elliott's gaze turned dark, just like in the canteen. Demaury couldn't let this lover of fresh meat touch Lucas.

His Lucas...

“Not to have an orgy,” Demaury said clearly.

That was the moment when all three of the girls turned to look at him. Lallemant’s eyes were rushing between the girls and Eliott, while Lucas himself was hopelessly trying to calm down. Demaury saved him. Yes, Eliott could be a total dick at times, but right now, Lucas was so thankful to him he was ready to give him a hug. Demaury was looking down on the girls. One of them knocked his hand off and left, grasping another girl by her arm and pulling her away from the couch. The third one sitting on Eliott’s lap turned out to be a tough cookie. Eliott stared at her, removed his hand from her waist, and raised his brow in a silent question. She just laughed in response.

“I don’t mind diversifying my sex life,” she turned her dirty gaze to Lucas. The moment he thought he succeeded at slowing down his racing heart, it went galloping again. Air got stuck in his throat. Has she just offered him a threesome with Eliott? Lallemant had never had such a nightmare in his life.

“Maggie, did you hear me well? I promised not to have an orgy tonight,” he tried to take her off his lap, but to no avail: she was holding him in a death grip. Such pressure would have amused Eliott before, but not when Lucas was looking at him.

“Let’s do it as usual then.”

“Let’s not.”

“But…”

“Maggie, bye. Bye, Maggie,” he nodded at the girl and smiled at Lucas.

“I can’t believe Monica was right! Well, excuse me, you two lovebirds,” she snorted and got off from Eliott's lap. The girl gave Lucas a weird look and headed toward the dancing crowd. He felt so much better now that she was gone.

“I can keep my word,” Eliott winked and sat down close to Lucas, and the latter felt no predatory or dangerous energy in Eliott at that moment. Even given that he was blatantly flirting with Lucas. Demaury, as if by accident, leaned his thigh against Lallemant. And Lucas had nowhere to move away from him. The girl had already driven him into a real trap.

“What a good trait. I’m glad for you,” he still could not calm down. A bottle of green liquid appeared in Eliott's hand out of nowhere. He wiggled his eyebrows playfully and poured himself a full glass. “What’s that? Absinthe?”

“Yeah, the bartender is a friend of mine. I got it under the table. Awesome thing. Finish your beer and hold out your glass,” Elliott took a big gulp and didn't even scrunch up his face. Lucas’s mouth opened in shock. He looked down at his full glass and found no strength in himself to drink it up.

“I don’t want to,” Lucas whimpered.

“Then pour it out. Over there. There’s a potted plant.” He saw Lucas’s eyes dart from the glass to the plant and back. Lallemant didn’t want to get into trouble following some stupid advice. Demaury rolled his eyes. “Jeez, Lucas, it’s artificial. When this party is over, there will be nothing but beer in it.” Not wasting any more time, Lucas poured his beer into the pot. Obviously, Eliott lied.

“Here we go, a toast to such good company!” Eliott said and leaned inappropriately close to Lucas. He clinked his glass against Lucas’s and drank it all up. It looked like the company was good, indeed. Lucas tried to relax and nodded to Demaury, sipping the green fluid. His eyes widened in surprise: he did not expect it to have a pleasant taste. “You like it?”

“No need to shout. I can hear you perfectly well. Well, yes, I do like it. It’s kinda sweetish. Not bad,” Lucas turned to his personal boa and looked right into his mesmerizing eyes, which seemed to get darker in the dim light of the room. Fight fire with fire was exactly how Lucas was going to get rid of the thoughts of Demaury.

“And how do you want me to speak to you? Like that?”

Eliott leaned in to rasp softly into his ear, tickling it with his hot breath. A bit closer, and Demaury would be lying on top of Lucas. His hand had already sneaked unnoticed behind Lucas’s back and – oops! – accidentally slipped onto his shoulder. Lallemant was trapped again. Eliott locked his darkened eyes with Lucas’s, casually sipping absinthe. Lallemant would probably be glad to push him aside, but he was not able to. He did not want to. It felt so right to be in Eliott’s warm and tender half-embrace. Beer that he had drunk earlier started to take effect, and slowly everything went easier on him. Lucas had already let go of all gloomy thoughts when a vision of Eliott and three girls popped in front of his eyes. He flinched. He had been sincere when he had opened up to Eliott in the shower. Deep in his soul, he had hoped for a completely different scenario. And while Lucas had enough courage to genuinely speak about most intimate things, Demaury… What about Demaury?

“Lucas, you are not looking at me. Why?”

The question shook Lucas out of his brooding. He downed his glass and handed it out to Elliot, silently asking for a refill. When there was enough alcohol in it again, he raised his eyes to look at Eliott. In front of him was sitting a raccoon from the drawing, except for he was not shrugging now but pleading for something with his impossible eyes. And that was what left Lucas totally confused. How Eliott could turn from a typical university playboy to someone so bewildering and seemingly familiar was a mystery to him. This Eliott was someone Lucas wanted to hold tight and not let go. Lallemant needed some time to think. Or rather to lie down and stare at the ceiling. To sort himself out. Demaury touched him with his fingers, drawing attention back to himself. Damn alcohol had been slowing down his not-so-fast thoughts. Lucas eyed the guy and smiled.

“What are you doing, Lucas?” Eliott definitely missed ‘to me’ in the question.

“I’m still not staying home drinking strawberry tea,” Lucas chuckled. Now that Eliott had resupplied him with some decent provisions, he wouldn't even look at that stuff. He would throw it away when he got back to the dorm. Hearing his own quote, Demaury just smiled again. Lallemant killed his glass and moved it closer to Eliott. "Hey, are you being greedy?”

“Hmm. I guess you’ve had enough. It hits the brain hard. The third glass will be too much.” At that moment, the music changed, and Demaury perked up. He brightened with excitement and grinned at Lucas. “Leave your glass, let’s go dancing. You can’t miss this song. Have you heard it before?” Lucas had not. He tried to focus on Eliott’s words instead. Had he just really been asked for a dance? With a guy? At a student party?

“I’m not very good at it. It will look like a dance of a…” Lucas made an attempt to bail.

“…A baby hedgehog. I know.”

“Oh gosh. Alright. A dance of a baby hedgehog.” Demaury was all but jumping at Lucas’s words. “Eliott, everyone’s watching.” Lucas looked around: no one could care less.

“I don’t like the idea of drawing more attention,” he made a puppy face, begging to stay on the couch, but Demaury was too obsessed with the music that beckoned him. Still, he had no intention of leaving Lucas sitting here alone. Lallemant was watching his hopes shatter.

“Shall I maybe bring you a cup of strawberry tea? No one cares, Lucas,” Eliott got up and looked down at cowering Lallemant. The latter looked as if he took his time to weigh options. Demaury could not afford to wait that long. The song – as well as the party – would come to an end. “Lucas? Hey, Lucas, look at me. You owe me, remember? Time to foot the bill. Come on, let’s go.”

“Stop acting like a demanding kid, please,” Lallemant knitted his brows in annoyance and sighed defeatedly. He was dead. “You’re the worst, Eliott Demaury. And a blackmailer.”

“You can call me Captain Hook if you want, I don’t give a damn. Get up, or we’ll miss the song,” he reached out his hand. “Come on, Tinker Bell.”

“Look who’s talking,” Lucas kept nagging but took his hand and got up. The song went to the second verse, but that did not seem to stop Eliott. Lallemant felt absinthe was taking effect. He was a little tipsy but had no problem walking, talking, or thinking clearly. He gripped his neighbor's forearm tightly and looked him straight in the eye. “Eliott, it's just a dance, do you understand?”

“So be it,” Demaury nodded and towed that pathetic mess of a man called Lucas in the center of the crowd. They got showered in blue and red lights gleaming from the ceiling and blurring their vision. The bass sounds pulsed in their ears and through their bodies. Far from being sober before, Lucas now felt totally drunk with what was going on. He felt Eliott’s hands rested confidently on the small of his back and moved him slightly to the beat. He got lost in the music that was his only reality at that moment. Except for Eliott’s hands. He sensed every finger touching him through the clothes. Lallemant closed his eyes and let his feelings lead him. His feelings, Eliott, and the beat. He was trembling inside; the tingle that first settled in his chest spread further to all parts of his body. Lucas was afraid he would fall apart any moment now, crumble, burn down, and remain as a pile of ash on the floor. He knew exactly what he should not do. Not open his eyes.

And yet he opened them.

Because Lucas had never followed the rules. He had always given in to any fleeting desire. Just like right now. He kept making the same mistake again. Not a quick learner, huh? As he raised his eyelids and trembled from the bright light, he turned completely blind. Eliott looked at him, mesmerized, taking in every little detail. He got everything he needed right in his hands; Lucas noticed it by the way Eliott eyed him. It was possible that now Lucas understood all those girls a little better. No one could resist those eyes. Lucas was so hypnotized by Demaury that he forgot where they were and what they were doing. The only things he saw were the blue eyes, cheekbones, and lips in front of him… A shiver ran down his spine at the thought of how soft and warm they would be against his skin. No doubt Eliott felt him trembling. There was no way he missed it. Lucas let out a shaky sigh and licked his lips anxiously. His Adam's apple moved instinctively.

And that was the moment when Eliott’s brain short-circuited. It took all his self-control not to do the guy right there in the crowd. The only thing that held him back was Lucas himself. If he gave in to the temptation, he could lose whatever little he had managed to achieve. They had had an instant connection, and their relationship had been moving so fast that Demaury ran the risk of having a stroke. He was so much into drawing comics about Lucas and himself that he went far from reality in some stories. Instead of going to this stupid party, he could have been sitting all night with a sketchbook and then in the morning rushed to the store to get a new one. Dreaming of it, he got carried away. He imagined getting back to his room in the morning with a new sketchbook, making Lucas his favorite tea, and preparing breakfast with oranges for him... And that was the point of no return. He tightened his grip on Lucas’s body. He felt they had more in common than they seemed to.

Not a single girl had spent the night in Eliott’s room in four years. He had given them whatever they had ever wanted from him, but he had never let them stay for breakfast. Most of the time, girls had been kindly asked to leave right after sex. He had needed to wake up alone, without anyone in sight whose name he would not even remember. And now… Now the guy whose eyes he was looking into got stuck in his head. It had been only a few days that they had known each other – it turned out that was enough for Demaury to go crazy. Three days ago, he would not have believed this. But now, in his dreams, he fed Lucas Lallemant with orange slices and kissed him all over, heard him laugh, ogled him smile, flicked on his crinkled nose. They showered together in the same cabin at night. He went so far in thinking about their future together that he saw stars flew before his eyes. Elliott knew that at such a fast pace, any turn could become the last one. Something twitched in his chest, some unpleasant sensation...

And then the song came to an end, and they abruptly recoiled from each other. It was as if a truck had passed between them. They looked stunned by the strong bond between them that suddenly became so obvious. Sparks flew like fireworks. A different song was already pulsing through the room, but they would not forget the one they had danced to. It was too much for Lucas, too fucking much. He needed to stay alone for a while to wrap his head around it all; it started to be vital. At the moment, his Roman chariot named ‘Elliott Demaury’ was heading full speed toward the brick wall. And he had no will to crash. A few years ago, Lucas promised himself that he would never leave things to chance again. Now he could either let go of the reins and save himself or try to turn this damn chariot in another direction. But there still was a chance of falling again and crashing. He felt unprecedentedly sober. Lallemant looked at Demaury, hoping that he would understand everything without words.

And Eliott did understand. He nodded, grabbed Lucas by the forearm, and pulled him towards the exit. Lucas was far from being able to quickly respond to external stimuli after such a tsunami of feelings. They were weaving through the crowd. There were lots of people Lallemant had never met before, but sometimes he noticed familiar faces of the fellow students. He was just trying to focus on anything but Eliott’s hand. He had had enough of intense touches for the day. Lucas almost burst into tears of relief when he saw the front door. Just twenty minutes, and he would be home. He needed a refreshing walk. A thought of Demaury following him to the dorm never came to his mind. Lucas took a deep breath and closed his eyes in pleasure when cool air hit his face. Parties are good, but please let him get back to his bed and hide under a blanket with oranges print.

“Let’s go. I’ll walk you home.” Lucas pursed his lips. He needed no company at the moment; otherwise, he would get an overdose of Eliott Demaury. Well, hello, instant addiction. Suddenly someone grasped Eliott’s arm, and he had to let go of Lucas unconsciously. “What now?”

“Eliott! There’s a freshman, I have no idea what he took, but he’s been throwing up and talking nonsense. Please, help. Other seniors seem to have left,” one of the juniors looked straight at Demaury and showed no intention to leave. While Eliott hissed in anger and despair, Lucas took a deep breath of relief. Finally, he would stay alone. “Weed and alcohol. Beer. That’s all, nothing stronger, they are freshmen. How many times do I have to repeat this? Morons. Lucas, will you wait, please? I’ll try to be quick.”

“Eliott, I’ll go home. The streets are well lit, there’s no chance I get lost,” Lucas tried to smile not to look so cowardly, but to no avail. Demaury chuckled. He could hardly be fooled. “Hey, hurry up, otherwise there will be no real blast for freshmen anymore,” Lucas wound Eliott up, but somehow reluctantly. After all, someone was sick over there.

“Gosh. Lucas, please…”

“Eliott, I beg you. We have to hurry.”

“Fuck it. See you.” He glanced at Lucas and raised his eyebrows. Then the door closed behind them.

Lucas looked at the winding road to the dorm. He was afraid of the dark, but the path was really well lit. Rare passers-by came and went. Taking another deep breath and regretting that he had not smoked a single joint that night, he began to go down the steps. It quickly became clear that he was not sober enough yet. Blocking all thoughts of Eliott, preferably until tomorrow, he texted James that he had left. The night was perfect. TGIF and tomorrow he did not have to go anywhere – and that was a whole lot of good thoughts to savor. While the guy was walking away down the road, the redhead girl took the last long drag and threw the cigarette butt down in the grass, stepping on it with the toe of her boot. She was standing in the shadow, and her presence was not evident. She rolled her eyes, took her phone out of her pocket, and sent a message.

“He’s just left.”


End file.
